How To Find Your Purpose
Whether it’s a blessing or a curse, humans have an innate drive to feel that our lives have some greater meaning outside of ourselves. In Man’s Search For Meaning, Victor Frankl explores the idea that someone who knows their “why” can endure any “how.” If we feel connected to what we do, hardship or even suffering can still feel meaningful because we know it’s in service of something bigger that makes it all worthwhile. Think of your personal hero in life - it’s likely that this person has a deep sense of purpose despite the challenges they’ve faced, like Martin Luther King Jr. or Mother Teresa, even if your hero’s sphere of influence was on a much smaller scale.
You may be wondering, “but how do I go about finding my purpose?” Some people find themselves within social structures that provide a strong sense of meaning, such as their family, career, or religious community, while for others this is a journey that has to be intentionally pursued. For many physicians, a career in medicine offered an alluring promise of purpose only to leave us feeling ineffective as part of a broken system. Whether you’re someone looking to strengthen your existing framework or someone who’s building your own direction from the ground up, this article provides the groundwork for finding your purpose.
Appreciative Inquiry
In coaching, we use an approach called appreciative inquiry where we identify what’s going well. Oftentimes if we’re mired in what’s missing, we don’t take the time to recognize what already fills our cup. If you’ll pardon the finance speak, we say what you appreciate (express gratitude for), appreciates (rises in value). This can be really useful when trying to determine your purpose. What do you already do now that you would still do if you didn’t get paid and no one was watching? Even the worst jobs often have at least one element that feels satisfying, but don’t limit yourself to your current position - think about prior jobs, volunteer work, education, hobbies, and travel. The individual pieces that you identify here may not be the answer, but you can start to tease out commonalities from your current and prior best experiences. Maybe the common thread is listening to people who are hurting, or organizing things, or marching to the beat of your own drum.
If you’re having a difficult time thinking of examples from your adult life, think farther back to when you were a child. Granted, there were already high external pressures for many of us at a young age, but think about what you could spend hours doing when your time was completely up to you. What other things did you want to “be” when you grew up? This isn’t to say that you have to divorce yourself from outside influences - we don’t develop in a vacuum, and often our experiences involving others (maybe even more so negative experiences) become a focal point that we want to create meaning around later on. Take some time to journal about all of these stories, from both childhood and adulthood, and jot down the themes that come to mind before moving on.
Strengths and Values
While it’s helpful to think through current and prior experiences for pearls of what matters to you, it can also be helpful to work through this in a more structured way. Fortunately, there are many tools that can help you assess your strengths (what you’re good at) and values (what’s important to you). But wait, you might be thinking, rather than focusing on what I’m already good at, shouldn’t I find my deficiencies and make them better? There’s nothing wrong with identifying a growth edge and pushing yourself outside of your comfort zone, but you’ll face challenges most effectively when you identify and leverage your strengths. Combining your skill with a challenge is known to lead to flow, a state of both intense focus and relative ease during which you tend to lose track of time. Flow states are known for feeling euphoric and fulfilling - think of an athlete or musician during a peak performance.
My favorite tool for learning your strengths is the free VIA Character Strengths Survey available here. Once you complete the questions, you’ll receive a ranked list of your strengths. I recommend starting with your top five and finding ways that you already use these in day to day life along with ways you can create more opportunities for these to shine in your work. Then I recommend using a values sort exercise like this one to identify your top values. Don’t overthink the questions - just go with your gut! While these activities won’t result in a purpose statement, they’ll give you an idea of what’s most important to include. After all, most of us don’t have one single overarching purpose like the heroes in the movies. Most of us have multi-faceted lives with different purposes in different domains. Now, armed with your themes from appreciative inquiry and your top strengths and values, you’re ready to move onto the last step.
Purpose as a Process
Once you know the areas and skills you want to focus on for your purpose, it’s time to set an intention. If you’re familiar with my goal-setting techniques, you know that I recommend setting both outcome-oriented goals (run a 5k race - “what” you want to achieve) as well as the process for reaching that goal (run 30 minutes three times per week - “how” you’ll get there). But when you’re trying to conceptualize something as lofty as purpose, it can be helpful to think a bit differently. When we frame our purpose around achievement, we’re setting ourselves up for all-or-nothing thinking and can find ourselves feeling that if we don’t do something the biggest/ brightest/ best it’s ever been done, then it was all for nothing.
For this reason, I recommend thinking of purpose as a process. Rather than “I help my patients overcome all their systemic barriers and cure their chronic illnesses with healthy lifestyle changes,” you may choose instead to focus on, “I use my creativity and social intelligence to show up for my patients with empathy for their struggles and to help them identify the changes that are feasible for them.” Notice in the second iteration how, by focusing on strengths and processes, you’re also being more realistic about what’s within your control. I struggle with overwhelm when thinking about the deficiencies in our healthcare system, but I focus on what’s within my influence by using my strengths of perspective and judgment (examining things from all sides) to help empower physicians to take control of their lives and find work that fulfills them. I believe having healthier and happier physicians means better health not only for us and our colleagues but for everyone, and this purpose aligns with my values of health and meaningful work.
You may walk away from this exercise with a new statement of purpose and sense of direction, or you might simply reflect on these different elements and think of ways to incorporate them into what you’re already doing. Whatever your approach, having a sense of purpose in life and as a physician is crucial to having a sustainable, fulfilling career. By noticing what has brought a sense of meaning to your life thus far, learning about your strengths and values, and focusing on the process rather than an outcome, you can build a rich sense of connection, both among different facets of your life and with other people in your community.
At EmpoweredMD, purpose and connection are our priorities. Please join us today to become part of our community and learn more about how to manifest these changes in your own life through our online resources and coaching opportunities.